Karmageddon

November 25th, 2008 by TRex @ 3:41 pm| Posted in GOP Cargo Cult, Right Wing Chucklefucks, public health |

(Image by darkblack)

Hahahaha!!  Okay, okay, so are you ready for this one?  I don’t think you are.

Ann Coulter has a book coming out.  Here’s what that desperate old queen who no one listens to anymore has to say about it:

SHEEEEE’S BACK! COULTER DELIVERS BOOK EXPOSING ‘GUILTY’ OBAMA MEDIA
Tue Nov 25 2008 10:52:15 ET

Bestselling author and controversialist Ann Coulter plans to crash Obama’s inauguration party with her new work, GUILTY.

Set for release first week of January, the book exposes and mocks, in graphic detail, the media’s love affair with all things Democrat and Obama. Coulter presents exhibits A through Z.

“GUILTY is a much-needed reality check on a Left gone wild,” declares the book’s jacket.

Oh, I’m so sure that everyone will stop their celebrating in its tracks as soon as the Coulterwurm’s newest “book” hits the shelves.  She’s gonna show us Democrats, oh, yes.  Mommy, I’m scared.

Except!  (And here’s the delicious part.)  God has other plans with regards to the promotion of that book.

Ann Coulter has a new book, “exposing” liberal media bias. She recently broke her jaw, though–a fitting symbol for the end of the Fox News regency–and won’t be able to talk about it.

Awwww.  Don’t everybody cry at once, mmmkay?

So, what do you suppose happened?  Did she gain a quarter pound and force her doctor to wire that shit closed before she could wolf down another rice cake?  Did she go and try to talk to a liberal with her baseball bat and lose hold of it in the scuffle?

I swear, swear, pinkie swear that I had absolutely nothing to do with this.  There is no tire-iron in the trunk of my car with a half inch of bloodied Bobbi Brown foundation and a few bleached strands of hair-weave stuck to it.  None.  Cross my heart.

  1. 15 Responses to “Karmageddon”

  2. By Petedownunder on Nov 25, 2008 4:37 pm |

    When I saw the news I iknew you’d be unable to resist. I promise I won’t tell about that tire iron in the pond near your house….

  3. By newdealfarmgrrrlll on Nov 25, 2008 4:41 pm |

    well, IMHO, that skanky crack rhymes-with-bore has’t been invited to that many “parties” recently so when she saw a nice line laid out on the coffee table, she dove onto it so hard she broke her jaw. Just sayin. But my heart’s not bleeding, i’m sure the poor dear obtained a niiiiiice pain prescription from her vet, oops, i mean doc.

    sigh. i get so bitchy when i haven’t had enough coffee.

  4. By TexasEllen on Nov 25, 2008 4:53 pm |

    Can we hope that she leads a fashion trend and her admirers also get their jaws wired? The peace, the quiet, the fun of pointing and giggling.

  5. By punaise on Nov 25, 2008 5:21 pm |

    I will *never* get over that image … gahhhhh!

    ____

    I swear, swear, pinkie swear that I had absolutely nothing to do with this.

    TonyaRex?

  6. By Laura on Nov 25, 2008 5:59 pm |

    punaise said

    I will *never* get over that image … gahhhhh!

    ____

    I swear, swear, pinkie swear that I had absolutely nothing to do with this.

    TonyaRex?

    We’ll let that one skate, ‘k?

  7. By punaise on Nov 25, 2008 7:59 pm |

    punaise said

    Obama’s Use of Complete Sentences Stirs Controversy

    By Andy Borowitz

    In the first two weeks after the election, President-elect Barack Obama has broken with a tradition established over the last eight years through his controversial use of complete sentences, political observers say.

    Millions of Americans who watched Mr. Obama’s appearance on CBS’s “Sixty Minutes” last Sunday witnessed the president-elect’s unorthodox verbal tic, which had Mr. Obama employing grammatically correct sentences virtually every time he opened his mouth.

    But Mr. Obama’s decision to use complete sentences in his public pronouncements carries with it certain risks, since after the last eight years many Americans may find his odd speaking style jarring.

    …

  8. By punaise on Nov 25, 2008 8:00 pm |

    punaise said

    We’ll let that one skate, ‘k?

    after years of despair and moral detachment, we just want to Kerrigan.

  9. By Laura on Nov 25, 2008 8:12 pm |

    punaise said

    Laura said

    We’ll let that one skate, ‘k?

    after years of despair and moral detachment, we just want to Kerrigan.

    That’s an ice one, Punaise!

  10. By punaise on Nov 25, 2008 10:16 pm |

    Lutz wait and see…

  11. By darkblack on Nov 26, 2008 12:44 am |

    A new book? Oh, goodie. Here’s to the pearls of wisdom dripping down her neck and chest.

    ;>)

  12. By Laura on Nov 26, 2008 1:51 am |

    punaise said

    Lutz wait and see…

    Ka-Zamb! Oni you can make such silk puns out of a salchow’s ear!

  13. By empressmitzi on Nov 26, 2008 12:29 pm |

    Actually, she probably broke her jaw trying to chew the rice cake. Chronic anorexia does take a toll on bone strength.

  14. By bmaz on Nov 26, 2008 11:49 pm |

    From one of our commenters at emptywheel:

    “anybody know who whacked ann coulter? i’m ready to pop fer that persons bail”

    heh!

  15. By www.democratz.org on Nov 27, 2008 9:04 am |

    FUCK ANN COULTER. She appears a tribune for the busted Republiklan party.

    If you want to wield power to stop the Republicans and the corporate Democrats then you might consider organizing a HUGE consumer boycott aka a purchasing strike against some of the major companies that give money to the Republican party and the corporate Democrats.

    Look here http://www.twiigs.com/poll/Politics/17960

    I tell people to answer a simple poll. I don’t preach to them. I let people see the information that I put forth and the person can answer and take action for themselves.

    Imagine hundreds of thousands of liberals making toll free calls and pulling their business from these companies and demanding their CEOs get us the action and legislation that we want.

    The nice aspect of my poll: Anyone can formulate similar toll free telephone campaigns and demand other action and legislation from the CEOs of these companies with huge organized boycotts.

    Thank you for reading this.

  16. By Peterr on Nov 27, 2008 9:32 am |

    God has other plans . . .

    In my professional experience, God *often* has other plans.

    And I believe you, TRex, that you had nothing to do with this. You’re a much more of a “the pen is mightier than the sword” kind of guy.

    Mmmmmm . . . pens . . .

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