Shorter Ashley Todd:

October 24th, 2008 by TRex @ 6:46 pm| Posted in FAIL, kegadoru konservatives |

“I tried to start a race war and all I got was egg (and this stupid scar) on my face.”

The little douchebaguette isn’t even sorry.

Ashley Todd, 20, of College Station, Texas, is charged with filing a false police report. She told investigators she has had psychological issues in the past and Bryant said detectives are working with the Allegheny County District Attorney’s office to determine whether Todd should be released on the misdemeanor charge or taken to a hospital for evaluation.

“She just opened up and said she wanted to tell the truth,” Bryant said. “She was upset with the media for blowing this into a political firestorm.”

Well, what did you expect, you little fascist twat?

She told Detectives J.R. Smith and Scott Evans varying stories about how she ended up with two black eyes and a backward letter “B” etched onto her right cheek late Wednesday. She said she remembers being in her car, driving around the city, and seeing the letter on her cheek when she looked into the rearview mirror. She said she immediately thought of Barack Obama when she saw the “B,” Bryant said.

“She said she doesn’t remember doing it but knows it must have been her who did it,” Bryant said.

Minutes later, she told detectives, she was driving around and “came up with a plan” to manufacture a story about being attacked at a Bloomfield ATM by a black man who was enranged by her John McCain bumper sticker.

A lot of people think Miss Todd deserves to go to jail for a good long time for this little stunt, but I’m thinking that before they lock her up, she could stand a thorough psychiatric evaluation and a stint in one of those rooms with the soft walls and a fitting for an “I-Love-Me!” jacket.  She ain’t well.

You know, there’s plenty of egg to go around the circle of faces in this story, but the biggest serving goes to the Eggman hisself, Matt Fucking Drudge, for running with a story that was so obviously flimsy, un-vetted, and yet had so much potential to ignite the decidedly powder-keggish atmosphere we’re currently living in.  Michelle MalKKKin gets half an egg (just the whites?) for remaining skeptical, but never missing a chance to slander liberals:

Throughout my career, I’ve covered dozens of fake hate crimes — campus hate crime hoaxes, Muslim hate crime hoaxes, fake noose hangings, etc., etc., etc. Most were perpetrated by liberals, but there have been some shameful ones on our side of the aisle as well.

MalKKKin the Mad Cow is conveniently omitting the fact that College Republicans have been behind three other hoaxes like this just this year.  As always, she’s a mendacious bitch, but, well, what are ya gonna do?